that moment when |
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Tuesday, July 18, 2017
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10:36 AM
Realization
My mental state is declining.
Felt like I'm stuck in a dark room, all these thoughts keep coming and haunting me.
These evil voices echoed the room, driving me crazy day by day.
My box of thoughts are being abused and I can't do anything to stop it.
I struggle to breath, to think, to do things that I used to enjoy doing.
Why am I like this?
I became this fragile fragments that is glued together by hope that can barely hold me up anymore.
I could disappear into thin air any minute now.
I feel like I walk in two different worlds; the Reality and my distorted dimension.
I can clearly see everything is going downhill.
Sad to see that the person I used to be‒so positive, cheerful and full of determination, disintegrate slowly and left with a persona that just wants to be left alone and cry for no clear reason.
Not a single care given if I'm crazy or not.
Maybe I am crazy but I don't want to admit I am.
Or I'm just waiting for the time I go crazy to come by and engulf me fully.
I'm not crazy but I don't know it anyway.
I don't even know half of what I want to do or think.
I don't have the motivation to do anything, to finish or to walk into Reality.
I hope to find the strength to pick up myself again, grow up and face the world.
Hopefully I could.
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